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Message to build an ark
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Having lived through several years of drought, it is hard to complain about the rain. But, we have had our fair share. Perhaps, a tad more than our fair share.

At the moment we are adequately hydrated and I hope we can say that in the weeks to come.

Some people have suggested the good Lord is revisiting the days of Noah and his famous ark.

Please allow me, a summa cum laude graduate of vacation Bible school, to offer a little Biblical explanation. God promised after the first flood he would never do it again.

If there were anybody I take at His word, it would be the Lord God Almighty.

Folks have been asked to raise their hand and swear to tell the truth, with God’s help. Let’s just say God’s got the truth thing covered.

Also bear in mind, the flood of Noah’s time flooded the whole earth. Biblical scholars say there is evidence of that. In this instance, I’ll take them at their word. They only allow me 550 words to say what I need to say, anyway.

While we have been deep in rainfall, it has been 110 degrees in the shade in parts of the desert Southwest. They would probably like to have some of our rain, but it doesn’t work that way.

A few years ago, Hollywood produced a movie about a guy who was a newscaster, then became a congressman. If that’s not enough, God told him to build an ark. In this scenario, God was going to flood Washington, D.C.

At this point, you can draw your own conclusions as to whether or not that’s a good idea. I am predicting many of you are saying Amen.

While I do not think our current rain pattern has risen to ark-like proportions, it did give me reason to think.

My late Daddy was one of those men who could do anything with his hands. He was good cook, a decent plumber and electrician and a good carpenter.

I did not pay attention to those things when I was a child. My job was to hold the flashlight and I didn’t do that well.

If the Lord tells me to build an ark — and let me stress that he hasn’t — I would encourage any of you who might join me to bring along a U.S. Coast Guard certified personal flotation device.

But during my thinking about ark building, I thought about where to get the supplies. The ark, according to the book of Genesis, was built with gopher wood. I went to one of those big-box places and asked a man if they stocked any gopher wood.

“Do you mean gopher repellent?” he asked.

No, I replied, I mean gopher wood.

He looked at me like I was from Mars. I had a sense of how Noah felt.

A friend of mine, Bobby Thomas, has a big lumberyard at Coal Mountain; he has lots of stuff, but no gopher wood.

I looked up gopher wood and found it has nothing to do with the animal of the same name.

In fact, Biblical scholars who agree there was an ark are not sure what it was made from. Some say it was cypress, cedar, pine, ebony, juniper, fir or boxwood.

If it is the last one and you see me cutting down your bushes, know the Lord sent me a message. I hope he includes instructions and a few good carpenters.

Harris Blackwood is a Gainesville resident whose columns appear on the Sunday Life page and on gainesvilletimes.com/harris.

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