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SEC Banter: Dawgs Win SEC East on Saturday
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It’s Georgia-Sakerlina week and the contest customarily comes equipped with enormous implications.

A Georgia win ensures the Dawgs remain in the SEC East driver’s seat. (The “driver’s seat” expression implies that one occupying the driver’s seat has control; they are in command. Any husband, however, who has driven a vehicle with his wife in the passenger’s seat knows this expression is utterly meaningless.)

A South Carolina win shakes up the East and gives the Floridas, South Carolinas and Missouris of the world a fighting chance at a trip to Atlanta.

I’ve heard college football pundits declare this week that, for UGA to claim the East, Saturday is a must-win.

SEC Banter takes a different view. To maximize the impact of my position, the next sentence should be read in a British accent or whatever other accent you think sounds intelligent and authoritative: Georgia wins the East with a win Saturday.

As George Strait said in his appropriately-titled 1999 hit, “Write This Down,” I ask you to do just that: write this down, take a little note, to remind you in case you didn’t know. The Dawgs lock up the SEC East with a victory Saturday afternoon in beautiful, historic Columbia, SC.

Yes, it’s way too early to call the East race. The Dawgs would be just 1-0 in the SEC East and still must run the gauntlet of conference play.

(Brief aside: I’m not positive what a gauntlet is. I think it’s something from the middle ages. But it sounded cool to drop in an SEC football article.)

SEC Banter’s confidence in predicting a UGA win Saturday equals SEC East supremacy is buttressed by the Dawgs’ remaining conference schedule. Georgia gets Tennessee at home (Vols aren’t there yet), Vandy at home (please), at Missouri (UGA will admittedly be on upset alert), at Arkansas (Hogs aren’t there yet), Florida in Jacksonville (just don’t see Flawdah winning that one), at Kentucky (please), and Auburn at home.

Georgia should be favored in all of these games except perhaps Auburn. But if they take care of business, even a loss to Auburn wouldn’t derail the Dawgs’ division title hopes. A potential rematch with Auburn would be teed up in the SEC Championship with a berth in the College Football Playoff on the line.

Write it down, Jawgia fans, you win the East with a win Saturday.

Mark Richt said earlier this week that the Gamecocks were dangerous because they’re a talented team with a great coach playing on their home turf. All true, but the South Carolina defense, like most defenses across the country, simply cannot withstand Gurley left, Michel right, and Chubb up the gut — on repeat.

While Georgia hasn’t emerged victorious from Columbia since 2008, back when Obama was running for president the first time (yuck), it’s safe to say UGA gets the W on Saturday.

Speaking of W, I sure do miss him.

Take your kids’ college savings and bet heavy on the Dawgs. They’ll thank you for it.

Normally, I’d use this remaining real estate to comment on other noteworthy SEC games and possibly throw in a 1980s movie or sitcom reference. But aside from Tennessee at Oklahoma, which should be enjoyed with slightly less interest than a Magnum, P.I. rerun, Whitesnake’s power ballad “Is This Love” packs more of a punch than Saturday’s remaining SEC schedule.

Instead of analyzing subpar SEC games, I’m headed to the bank to withdraw the kids’ college funds. Putting everything on Georgia to cover the spread against South Carolina. The Ol’ Ball Coach doesn’t stand a chance in this one, right?

My kids sure hope not.

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