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SEC Banter: Wild week of big takedowns shakes up SEC
11162017 BANTER
Auburn wide receiver Marquis McClain runs the ball against Georgia defensive back Deandre Baker during the second half of the game last Saturday in Auburn, Ala. - photo by Associated Press

It was a wild weekend in the Southeastern Conference with plenty of takedowns, so let’s break it down SEC Banter style:

Auburn Takes Down Georgia: An old coach of mine used to say, “It’s not what you’ve done; it’s what you’ve done lately.”

Lately, in the wake of its embarrassing beatdown at Auburn, UGA tumbled from No. 1 in the College Football Playoff rankings to No. 7. Georgia’s stay atop the rankings reminds me of Bill Medley’s No. 1 hit from 1987, “(I’ve Had) The Time of My Life,” the theme from Dirty Dancing.

Neither UGA nor Bill Medley lasted long at No. 1.

The good news for the Dawgs? They can still have the time of their lives and make the Playoff simply by winning three straight games against Kentucky, Georgia Tech, and either Alabama or Auburn in the SEC Championship.

Plus, for what it’s worth, the McRib is back at McDonald’s.

Tennessee Takes Down Butch Jones: Sign me up to be Butch Jones (other than having to go by the name “Butch,” or sporting that awful haircut). The guy goes 14-24 in the SEC over five seasons, is fired for failing to produce a winning product, and Tennessee will pay him $8.26 million through early 2021.

That’s more than $200,000 a month for being a loser.

Is college football crazy or what? Losing should be grounds to fire a coach “for cause,” dispensing with the obligation to buy out the remainder of his contract.

Hey, Butch, since you have some spare time, I’m always in need of ideas for SEC Banter. I can’t pay you 200 grand per month, but I do make a mean pot of chili.

Mullen Nearly Takes Down Bama: In his quest to depart Starkville, Mississippi, for greener pastures, Mississippi State’s Dan Mullen is auditioning for every coaching vacancy by coaching up his Bulldogs team.

If not for Alabama’s dynamo quarterback Jalen Hurts, who willed his team to victory, Mullen’s stock would have risen even higher with a signature win against the Tide.

Mullen to Tennessee? To Florida? I’m guessing Mullen stays put — $4.5 million per year in Starkville goes a long way.

Banter Takes Down a Ton of Food in NOLA: I visited my hometown of New Orleans last weekend and am still full. Gulf oysters on the half shell, fried shrimp poboy, Popeyes’ red beans and rice (they just taste better in New Orleans), more oysters, trout almondine and bread pudding are among the dishes I devoured.

Kentucky Takes Down Vanderbilt: No one besides the players’ families watched, and that includes you, but Kentucky beat Vandy 44-21 last Saturday.

Time to Take Down the Week 12 Schedule: The following pathetic excuses for football programs appear on this week’s SEC schedule: Mercer, Louisiana-Monroe, Wofford, UAB and Arkansas.

Time to jettison the late-season gimme’ games and limit SEC teams to one cupcake per year, preferably in mid-September.

Take Down Those Early Christmas Decorations: What’s with the Christmas decorations all over the place in mid-November? Anyone who puts out Christmas decorations before Thanksgiving should have to listen to Medley’s “(I’ve Had) The Time of My Life” on repeat until Christmas Day.

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