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A mortifying moment at the DMV
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Several weeks ago, we were at dinner with some friends and the conversation turned to life’s most embarrassing moments.

There was talk of ladies walking in the men’s room by mistake, tripping and falling. All grounds for valid embarrassment. However, one thing we all had in common was some form of wardrobe malfunction. 

As I concluded sharing my most embarrassing moment, it was declared the winner of this impromptu contest of sorts.

Since I’m all about being real, I will just tell you about it. Maybe it will make you feel better about yourself. I’ll take one for the team.

A couple of years ago, I went with my momma to the DMV to renew her driver’s license. I think we can all agree that in itself is an experience like no other. We went early in the morning and if there was one person in that room, there were probably 150.

We had been waiting awhile and I found it necessary to use the restroom. If you have been to the Gainesville DMV, you know you must walk in front of all the waiting customers to go to and from the restroom. Just keep that in mind.  

Eventually, it was Mother’s turn to go to the front to the counter and I went with her to help navigate through the process. We had probably been standing there close to 20 minutes when I felt someone tap me on the shoulder. I looked and there was just the most beautiful young lady standing behind me. I thought oh how sweet, she’s come to help us.

But no, she wasn’t there to facilitate our experience. She was there — because I’m convinced she had drawn the short straw among all of the 150 people — to tell me, “Ma’am, your skirt is, ahem, tucked in your underwear.”

Oh yes she did. And yes it was. I had been walking around and standing in front of all of the DMV’s customers in this delicate situation. Just take me now. 

I politely said “Thank you so much for telling me.” And I was truly thankful. It took a lot of guts for that sweet young girl to tell this older woman she clearly must be losing her faculties when it comes to the appropriateness of skirt wearing. 

I slowly pulled down my skirt in the back and acted like all was normal.

Y’all, as tempting as it was to look into the faces of those folks behind me, I did not. I couldn’t.  The DMV can be a stressful place so I’m firmly convinced I was put there to lighten the mood of some poor soul or more than likely, 150 of them. 

I’m not really sure what kind of recipe goes with life’s most embarrassing moment, but I’m going to assume some comfort food. This is our family’s favorite:

Slow cooker macaroni and cheese

  • 2 cups uncooked elbow macaroni
  • 1 (10.75 ounce) can condensed cheddar cheese soup, undiluted
  • 1 cup milk
  • 1/2 cup sour cream
  • 1/4 cup butter, cubed
  • 1/2 teaspoon onion powder
  • 1/4 teaspoon pepper
  • 1/8 teaspoon salt
  • 1 cup shredded cheddar cheese
  • 1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
  • 1 cup shredded provolone cheese

Cook macaroni according to package directions for al dente.

Meanwhile, in a large saucepan, combine soup, milk, sour cream, butter and seasonings. Cook and stir over medium-low heat until blended. Stir in cheese until melted.

Drain pasta; transfer to greased 3-quart slow cooker. Stir in cheese mixture.

Cook, covered on low 1-2 hours or until heated through.

Crevolyn Wiley is a Gainesville resident with her first published cookbook “Cooking with Crevolyn” available at J&J Foods. She can be contacted at crevolyn.wiley@jandjfoods.com.

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